Lunch With Poncho Villa

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One day last summer, I was riding by myself, south of Tucson near the Mexican border. I found a wash that twisted through the desert. It had walls about six feet deep, and very steep. I dropped down into it, and rode for about eight miles, when I came around a tight right hand turn, and there he was! Sitting in the wash about thirty feet in front of me. He had an old bend cigar hanging from his lips, with a nasty smile on his scruffy face! He pulled out his six shooter, and pointed it right at me. All I could do was slam on my brakes. There was no place for me to go. I was trapped!

I shut off my bike... He said, "get off that machine!" Well, he had the gun, so I got off. He then said, "Take off your funny looking pants!" Like I said, he had the gun, so I dropped my pants. He then said, "Take a dump!" I thought this was a little strange!! But he had the gun, so I took a dump. Then he said, "Eat it!!" Oh man!! What could I do, he had that gun pointed right at me!! So I ate it!

 He laughed so hard, that he fell out of the saddle and dropped his gun. I ran over and dived on it, got back to my feet, and pointed it right at ole Ponchos' head!

 I said, "Take off those pants Poncho!" Well, the shoe was on the other foot, so to speak now. He took his pants off. I said, "Take a dump!" I had the gun pointed right at him, so he took a dump. I said, "Eat it!" Well, he knew I'd blow his head off if he didn't eat it....So he did!
Yep! That was the day I had lunch with Poncho Villa!